I'm waiting for the tears to come but they aren't there. Reality just slapped me in the face with a sledge hammer. I've never seen so clearly what's right in front of me. With each word she spoke it sunk in more and more. All the times id been sent away. All the times I reached at a shadow or longed for the smell of her perfume. The lonely nights counting the headlights with no avail. The tv which became my lullaby. At this moment I see it all. The last piece of the puzzle neatly tucked under the floor board waiting for me to stumble upon it.